Duh.....

So I just read the most fascinating article and brings glaringly into focus how ridiculous a society we have become. Disney is offering a refund to all the people who have purchased "The baby Einstein" DVD's. They are doing this due to a CLASS-ACTION lawsuit brought on by some parenting company that states that "false advertising"enticed the parents purchase. That the DVD's have been "unmasked" and "striped down" to what they really are......a way to occupy your child while you make dinner. And that they do not, in fact, make your child a genius. To which I holler a big 'ole DUH!!!!

Seriously, did parents honestly think that they could put their kid in front of the Little Einstein DVD and that they would become a spontaneous genius? And did those same parents feel so betrayed when the 2 year old doesn't know the difference between Bach and Beethoven as to warrant a huge refund for DVD's that have in fact kept their children's attention?! What the?

I have these DVD's and I like them. And that is all I feel to rant about this day.

More positive....

Alright, so here's the deal. My soul needs to make a quarter turn. Not an about face, just a little tweek if you will. I realized in a moment of solitude that even in my "All-thanks prayers" I was thanking Him for my half empty glass. I.E. Thank you for helping me not COMPLETELY lose it, THANK YOU for the beauty of the earth, especially the mountains in Park City (I AM SO MOUNTAIN-HUNGRY), THANK YOU for my ward family in Park City, where I am no longer, which really sucks cause I need my friends and I need to hike etc. etc. You get the point. So even though I was thanking Heavenly Father for everything under the sun it was like I was still thinking about what wasn't there. So I have decided that this is not only unproductive hypocrisy but it is also really detrimental to my spirit.

When I realized this tears came down my cheeks as I humbly asked for guidance on how to return to my normal "GLASS IS ENTIRELY FULL" self. And as always, the Lord, in his infinite wisdom, love and mercy is showing me how. And even in that "AHA" moment, full of His grace, my mind wasn't entirely ready and it began to tug me back to the now and yesterday with "but Kent needs a real job", "I need to have Bella home with me" etc. As soon as the thoughts came I dismissed them showing them the door. They still try to climb in a window but whatever. And at that moment, a perfect vision of hope and light filled my heart and radiated out to my very fingertips. It was an incredible moment and feeling. It was the picture of Kent holding Harry with Bella at his side smiling at me in front of the Portland Temple. And I realized my world is complete. This picture filled me up and I need only to call on it to widen my ability to withstand the now. I also felt that God knows my needs and our wants and He will provide.

Since then when someone asks how I am. I tell the truth, as I did before. "I AM GREAT!" Before it was "I am great...we're doing fine..... blah, blah, blah, something needs to happen, sick of this battle, blah, blah.... "you get the picture.
When I decided to make that turn, and it feels to be a mental, physical, AND emotional turn, everything looks brighter to me. And yes, it has only been three days since I made this decision, but still.

Portland Hills = endurance

Portland Plains= patience

Portland Cliffs= I think I can't take anymore. And I look around and open my eyes. "He that hath eyes let him see." I now have eyes. I am so grateful for the gospel, which makes my life valuable, gives it meaning.

Say What....

Harry: "Mom, we watch Geral Congress?"

Mom: (honestly sorting out the words, and determining if my son will have a brillant political career....what is Geral Congress?) "Oh....you mean General Conference."

Harry: "Ya, that one."

CONVERSATION #1:

Bella: "Mom I want you to meet Jennifer."

Me: "Oh. (honestly looking around). Uh where is Jennifer?"

Bella: "In the glass jar. She is my pet fly."

Me:"Pet fly?"

Bella: "Ya I caught her on the window missing me so I put her in the jar. Can I have a raspberry?"

Me: "For Jennifer?"

Bella: "Ya. She's hungry."

And this tale has a very Bronte-esque ending. Jennifer lives for 5 days in the jar before drowing in the rotten raspberry juice. What a romantic way to go though, ya know, for a fly.

CONVERSATION #2:

Bella: "This is Callie the horse (wooden horse). I got her from a garage sale. That's where all horses come from."

SUMMARY:

I really just don't know what else to say here. I think I may have missed the mark .....not sure what mark but some HUGE, glaring mark somewhere.

This is the animal (crossed out) spider that greeted me as I went running this morning. I think he is smiling and savagely tapping his legs going "hehehehe. I will get you my sweets." And with this spider that Kent caught with the kids comes a new love of the chase and capture of all living things. Where did all my glass jars go? Thanks sweetie!